Common Modern Dating Terms Explained

Updated: Jun 13

Benching

In the modern dating world, this is when you are dating someone, and you aren't exactly too sure that it is working out or not. You're not feeling it, so you disengage from the relationship a bit and keep them on the back burner for a rainy day.


Breadcrumbing

In the modern dating world, someone feeds their ego by stringing someone along for their gain without having any real intentions with that person. They will continue to throw little bits out there to keep the other person thinking that they might have a shot.


Gaslighting

In the modern dating world, a person is manipulating someone by psychological means into questioning their sanity. It is a form of psychological abuse.


Ghosting

In the modern dating world, this is when a person cuts off all communication with their friends or the person they're currently dating, with no warning or notice before going dark. In other words, they will drop off the face of planet earth out of the blue. This person will likely avoid phone calls or texts, stay off social media, and avoid being seen in public.


Cushioning

This involves flirting and engaging with new potential prospects in the modern dating world before ending your current relationship to have a second-best option when things go south. This is so that you have a cushion to land on when your primary relationship ends.


Zombieing

In the modern dating world, this occurs when an ex, or someone who previously ghosted you, resurfaces in your life again, usually in the form of a social media interaction.

Haunting

In the modern dating world, this is when someone ghosts or breaks up with you but continues to watch all of your social media stories and posts to remind them that you still exist freely.


Kittenfishing

In the modern dating world, this is when you present yourself on a dating app in an unrealistically optimistic way.


Phishing

In the modern dating world, a person tries to build up trust over a series of communications via the internet and then begins to request money, personal information and favors to steal from this person.


Sidebarring

In the modern dating world, this is when you are having a confidential text conversation with someone else while talking to another person, whether in real life or online.


Stashing

In the modern dating world, this is when you're dating someone, and you feel like it's going well for the most part. But you can't help but notice that they don't post you on any of their social media accounts. The person you're with is into you, but they aren't too sure they want to close the door on other possibilities just yet.

Firedooring

This is when one person has all of the power in an exchange. For example, someone who will never make plans to see you but expects you to drop everything and run to them when they say so.

Love Bombing

This involves expressing an excessive amount of affection at the very beginning of a relationship, only to lose interest once you've finally got them right where you want them.


Eclipsing

In the modern dating world, this is the act of adopting the interests and hobbies of someone you are currently dating and pretending you like the activities to gain praise or approval from them.


Caspering

In the modern dating world, this is the more friendly version of ghosting. Instead of disappearing on someone entirely, a thoughtful message is sent to let that person know that they will no longer be in contact moving forward.


Orbiting

In the modern dating world, this is a discreet trick that someone may use to let a former lover or fling know that they are still involved in them without coming out and undeviatingly saying it.